Often you will hear that you should not assume, and what it makes of “you” and “me.” However, all of us form assumptions, and in actuality they are an important part of negotiations. When entering a negotiation, we should review our own assumptions and anticipate the assumptions of the other party.
There is nothing wrong with making assumptions. The problem is when one thinks and acts as if the assumption is the absolute fact. If you know you are making an assumption, you can prepare for the unexpected and will be less likely to assert your position dogmatically. If your assumption is proved wrong, it will be less likely that you will be hurt by such an assumption when you realize from the beginning that the assumption may be proved false. Unfortunately, many of our beliefs are based on unconscious, hidden assumptions. These are not as easy to bring out in the open and we often fail to recognize their existence.
When I say, “I saw a begger walking out of the ladies’ room,” what is your first thought? Are you shocked? Why might you be shocked? Did you immediately think the begger was a man? I did not say the begger was a man, but many people have a hidden assumption upon hearing that term that it refers to a male. Hidden assumptions can lead us away from the facts and can be very difficult to recognize and correct.
During negotiations, you must remember that what you assume is only a guess or a probability. If you fail to understand the immediate situation because of a hidden assumption, you may be stuck with the assumption as a fact throughout the negotiation. This can lead to disaster. I was reading “The Complete Negotiator” by Gerard I. Nierenberg as research for this column, and he shared an example where assuming could have proved disastrous. During a conference regarding an important and complicated lease, one attorney handed the opposition the lease and stated, “Here is the standard Real Estate Board Form Lease. You undoubtedly know it by heart, practicing as long as you have.” In actuality, these “standard” forms contain a mass of conditions in fine print and it would be extremely difficult for anyone to remember the significance of each and every item in the forms. However, the remark forced the one attorney to assume a role, and instead of analyzing the lease as it applied to the present situation, he dispensed with reading the standard printed form. He assumed that examining it would show his ignorance. He acted out the role of having to know every word of the “standard” lease. The hidden assumption had been used strategically to his disadvantage.
Nierenberg lists three categories of hidden assumptions that are useful in negotiating: first, those regarding the extensional world, the physical world which exists outside the mind of a human being; second, those concerning the intensional world, the world which exists within the mind of each of us; third, the other person’s intensional world. The first category contains the largest and broadest area of hidden assumptions such as those that concern the environment, time and space in which we live. We verify, the best we can, the “facts” of the world around us. Many of the views we hold regarding the outside world are based on assumptions, and we subject them to continued verification. We just need to be careful about believing in absolutes that require no further verification when our absolute may in fact still be an assumption.
Our intensional world is a picture of the outside world, and we must realize that ideas to not have the same meaning for other people that they may have for us. It can be very beneficial to anticipate the other’s assumptions correctly during negotiations. However, it can also put us at a disadvantage to make assumptions about other people’s motivations and actions. We need to realize that our view of the world, along with our value judgments and moral concepts are personal and valid for us alone. If we fail to recognize this, and do not listen to our opposition, we may deprive ourselves of valuable information.
Assumptions are a natural part of life and the negotiation process. There are times when they can be useful in negotiation situations, and other times when they may be detrimental to your success. Hidden assumptions also play a part in various phases of negotiations. When entering a negotiation, we must remember to review our own assumptions and attempt to anticipate the assumptions of the other party. By doing this, and recognizing the role assumptions have in the process, the successful negotiator will better be able to utilize both agreed upon facts and assumptions to negotiate solutions.